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Bisexuality is its Own Team, Study Shows

January 16th, 2008

Should bisexuals just “pick a team?” Why don’t they just “get off the fence?” These are some of the common frustrations aimed at bisexuals from the straight and LGBT communities alike. But a new study finds that, at least in women, bisexuality is not a result of sexual confusion. Nor is it a transitional phase between homosexuality and heterosexuality. ABC News reports that a new study by Lisa Diamond, an associate professor of psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah, found bisexuality in women to be a “natural state.” Diamond told ABC that her findings suggest that bisexuality should be recognized as a distinct sexual orientation.

The small study followed 79 bisexual women for 10 years, and while some occasionally waivered in their sexual preference, few described themselves as “switching” to become either lesbian or straight. The research also challenged the notion that bisexual women are less likely to be successful in committing to a long-term relationship. The majority of the study participants were in monogamous relationships that lasted five years or more.

Book coverThe study will be published in the January issue of the American Psychological Association’s journal, Developmental Psychology. Diamond has also written two books on female sexuality: Rethinking Positive Adolescent Female Sexual Development (2006) and the forthcoming book (to be published by Harvard University Press on February 15, 2008), Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women’s Love and Desire.

Bisexual Men More Rare?

Larry Craig and the “on the down low” phenomenon notwithstanding, other research has found that bisexuality is more common in women than men. Diamond’s research suggests that women have different patterns of sexual response than men do. But Diamond says her research should not be construed to mean that male bisexuality does not exist, but rather than more study is needed to define its unique characteristics.

In my experience, lesbians often struggle to describe how female relationships are different. It’s an emotional thing. It’s about the connection, as much or more so than sexual intimacy.

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Posted in Bisexual Issues, Coming Out, Dating and Relationships, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | No Comments

News of the Obvious: Jody Foster is a Big Dyke

December 12th, 2007

Breaking News of the Obvious Alert. This news should move lesbians everywhere– like “t’ee in the way!” Jody Foster, the object of thousands of dyke crushes, has finally acknowledged that the sky is blue, the earth is round, and she is a lesbian. Accepting the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award at the Hollywood Reporter’s Women in Entertainment Power 100 event last week, Foster thanked “my beautiful Cydney” during her acceptance speech. She then added that Cydney “sticks with me through all the rotten and the bliss.”

Jody FosterAlthough references to and rumors of her lesbianism are many, the mention of producer Cydney Bernard in front of the Hollywood Reporter crowd is Foster’s first public reference to her 15-year relationship with Bernard. The two are reported to have met while Foster was filming Sommersby in 1993. Bernard was a production coordinator for the film. Foster has always refused to discuss the paternity of her children. She even ignored Out magazine’s picture of her on their cover (along with CNN’s Anderson Cooper) with the headline, “The Glass Closet: Why the Stars Won’t Come Out and Play.”

Interestingly, the Hollywood Reporter seems to be playing down the news, with no overt references to Foster’s self-acknowledgment on their Website. The only mass media references I could find were at The Arizona Republic’s website AZCentral and at The Times Online out of London. Both articles were published today, even though Foster’s comments were made on December 4.

Perhaps the mainstream media’s subtlety is testament to Foster’s power. The reknowned actress is the winner of two Academy Awards and more than two dozen other honors (including both a Golden Globe and Screen Actor’s Guild Award for her performance in “Nell,” one of my personal favorites). She earns millions for her acting, including a $15 million check for The Brave One, released in September of this year. She ranks 57th on Entertainment Weekly’s “Greatest Movie Stars” of all time and most recently appeared on EW’s 2007 list of “The 50 Smartest People in Hollywood.” Her clout and connections may be the cause of the lack of mainstream media coverage. Or perhaps a confirmation of what is already known is just not news.

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Posted in Coming Out, Queer Entertainment, Queer Media, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | 1 Comment

Out of Two Closets: Gay and Wiccan

October 30th, 2007

Christopher PenczakIn our first podcast, Life on Q interviews Christopher Penczak, a gay man, a witch, a teacher and the author of 12 books on Wicca. Christopher discusses what it’s like to come out of two closets–as a gay man and as a witch. He talks about how homosexuality is viewed by the Wiccan community, and what queers and witches have in common.
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For more information on Christopher’s book, Gay Witchcraft: Empowering the Tribe, see a description and reviews here.   Or click here to buy Gay Witchcraft from Outwrite Bookstore.

Visit Christopher’s Website

Visit Christopher’s MySpace page

Learn more about pagan religions at The Witch’s Voice, a site recommended by Christopher.

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Posted in Coming Out, Religion & Spirituality, Uncategorized | | No Comments

Jim Neal Out for NC Senate Seat

October 23rd, 2007

North Carolina businessman Jim Neal is taking on Republican incumbent Elizabeth Dole for U.S. Senate, and as of this weekend, he’s taking on homophobia as well. In an online discussion Saturday on BlueNC.com, Neal responded to a comment that he is rumored to be gay by saying, “I am indeed. No secret and no big deal to me– I wouldn’t be running if I didn’t think otherwise.”Jim Neal for U.S. Senate

The story was picked up by DailyKos on Sunday, and was the subject of an AP story published on the Winston-Salem Journal’s website yesterday.  Even USA Today posted the story on its breaking news blog.

According to the Winston-Salem Journal article, Neal is the only Democrat who has so far entered the race for Dole’s seat, even though Democrats feel the Senator is vulnerable because of her support for the war in Iraq and because she was running the National Republican Senatorial Committee during the party’s general beating in the 2006 mid-term elections. The Congressional Quarterly listed her seat as one of the five most vulnerable in the country, yet Democrats are reportedly wary of signing up for what promises to be a very expensive campaign. Already declining to run are Attorney General Roy Cooper, Gov. Mike Easley, U.S. Rep. Brad Miller and two state legislators.

Enter Jim Neal, a Democratic fundraiser and founder of The Agema Group, a Chapel Hill-based corporate financial advisory firm. A North Carolina native, Neal returned to his home state last year. With many of the higher profile contenders opting out, it will be interesting to see if the national and state Democratic parties will help fuel Neal’s run. Even though he announced he filed his papers for candidacy on October 4, as of this writing, Jim Neal is nowhere to be found on the North Carolina Democratic Party’s list of 2008 candidates. On the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee’s Website, a news search turned up no results for Jim Neal. Ditto on the DSCC’s blog.

Does Democratic establishment’s silence on Neal’s candidacy reveal an admission that they do not believe Dole is defeatable? Is it a defiant shunning of a candidate new to the political scene who is apparently not a “chosen one?” Or worse still, does Democratic denial of Neal’s candidacy show their true colors when it comes to the politics of homosexuality? Perhaps the Dems want our votes, our contributions and our service, but they do not want queer participation in politics.

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Posted in Coming Out, Homophobia, Queer Politics, Uncategorized | | No Comments

Coming Out is a Personal Decision with Public Consequences

October 11th, 2007

It’s National Coming Out Day—a time when closet doors swing open to shed light on the obstacles and opportunities that come with being honest with yourself, your friends and family about who you are. Coming out can be dangerous. Empowering. Life-changing. Relationship-altering. And incredibly freeing. Sometimes, it’s a political statement. Often, it simply results from fatigue. The energy it takes to censor your pronouns and obscure the details of your social life is exhausting. Occasionally it’s accidental. An e-mail is read, or a phone call is overheard. Usually, coming out is not a single event. There’s no press conference, no formal statement. It’s a process that may start with a mother, and then repeat with a co-worker, or a childhood friend. At least that’s what it was for me.

A gay man once shared with me a great analogy for the coming out process. At first, the closet door cracks open. In the light that streams in, you start to look at the queer world, and think about what it might be like, or how you feel. Soon, you open the door to the closet and enter the bedroom. It’s your first homosexual experience. It might be with a friend for whom your feelings became overwhelming. Or it might be a trip to a gay bar or festival, where you actively seek an outlet for the desires that are becoming more powerful, and less and less deniable. Soon, you realize that there are many others like you, and you seek out support and friendship with people who will not judge you. Moving out of the bedroom into the living room, you begin to build a social circle full of those who share your secret.

Some people choose to stay inside. They’re out of the closet, out of the bedroom, but not comfortable going outside. Others feel so locked in by the secret that eventually, they come out into the world. For some, it destroys family relationships or threatens a career. For others, it brings a sense of freedom that is hard to describe. Taking off that heavy, oppressive cloak of denial, fear and lies is exhilarating. The load is lighter. Self-respect and confidence grows. When you are true to yourself, even in the face of fear and prejudice, you are truly free. This must be what if feels like to be heterosexual. There’s nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide. At least, that’s what my personal coming out experience was like.  Would you like to hear it?  Read on.

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